Bullies Called Him Pork Chop. He Took That Pain With Him And Then Cooked It Into This. (repost)

Repost of an amazing video story. If you’re feeling discouraged, worthless, depressed, self-conscious, or that others are better than you – watch this video! If you’re being/or have been bullied, teased, mocked, put down, belittled, verbally abused, slandered, verbally attacked, gossiped about, or given a difficult time — watch this!…but also seek help from a friendly and supportive source.

Shane Koyczan, the author of this video, was bullied a lot when he was a kid. So he took that pain and made this stunning video with the help of some amazingly talented people. It’s kind of breathtaking and powerful, just a warning. Also, it has a happy ending.

Women and body image: a man’s perspective

Ever wondered why a man can look at an advert featuring a six-pack and laugh, while a woman might look at a photograph of female perfection and fall to pieces? William Leith thinks he might have uncovered the answer.

Advertising for lingerie Photo: PHILIPPE HAYS / ALAMY

By William Leith
Published: 7:00AM BST 23 May 2010

Plenty of guys have told me this story. The guy in question is preparing to go to a party with his girlfriend. She is trying on shoes and dresses. He is telling her how good she looks. She tries on more shoes, more dresses. And then: the sudden, inexplicable meltdown. She crumples on the bed. Something is horribly wrong. Now the party is out of the question.

The guy sits down. He hugs her. What’s the problem? Gradually the truth emerges. ‘Do you know what it was?’ the guy will say later to his friends. ‘She said she “didn’t look right”. She felt … I don’t know. Fat. Or that she was the wrong shape. It’s all about her body.’ He goes on: ‘I told her she looked great. Which she does, right?’

At this point the other guys will say, ‘Yeah – she looks great.’ And: ‘She looks fine.’ And: ‘I saw her the other day, wearing those shorts.’ And: ‘She is hot.’ Then the first guy will say, ‘That’s what I kept telling her. And that’s when she got really upset. She said, “You just don’t understand.”‘

It’s true – men, by and large, do not understand. In her book The Beauty Myth, Naomi Wolf made this point very powerfully. When a woman has a crisis of confidence about the way she looks there is nothing a man can do to console her.

‘Whatever he says hurts her more,’ says Wolf. ‘If he comforts her by calling the issue trivial, he doesn’t understand. It isn’t trivial at all. If he agrees with her that it’s serious, even worse: he can’t possibly love her, he thinks she’s fat and ugly.’

“Is it Ugly?????”

Do you dislike your look or something particular about your appearance? Is the mirror your best friend, lover, or enemy? If it’s the latter or something similar to it, read on.
This post was compiled from different sources and is dedicated to one of my blog readers who commented on the “Thank God For My Big Nose” post.
—HappyPizza

Born with facial disfigurement:

The story of one of the great presidents of Harvard College, Charles William Eliot (March 20, 1834 – August 22, 1926), is worth recalling. Born with a serious facial disfigurement, he suffered deeply from having a large, liver-colored birthmark across his right cheek. He discovered as a young man that nothing could be done about it, & he must go through life with this mark. It is related that when his mother brought to him that tragic truth, it was indeed “the dark hour of his soul.”

His mother told him, “My son, it is not possible for you to get rid of this handicap. We have consulted the best surgeons, & they say that nothing can be done. But it is possible for you, with God’s help, to grow a mind & soul so big that people will forget to look at your face.”

Eliot went on to be a chemistry professor of such limited talents that when he applied for a vacant chair, the post was given to another man. Crushed, Eliot went to Europe, where he was deeply impressed by the German university system. America, he wrote, must develop “a system of education based chiefly upon the pure and applied sciences, the living European languages, and mathematics. The vulgar argument that the study of the classics is necessary to make a gentleman is beneath contempt.”

Later on he was chosen president of Harvard over other candidates with considerable conservative opposition; he became Harvard’s president in 1869. He transformed the provincial college into the preeminent American research university that still is today. Eliot served the longest term as president in the university’s history. Eliot made sweeping changes. He abolished virtually all required courses. He canceled the stern Puritan rules of discipline: no more compulsory daily chapel, no more bans on smoking or theater going. He overhauled and greatly improved the medical and law schools, founded the Graduate School of Arts and Sciences (1872) and the business school (1908). He also presided over the establishment of a college for women, Radcliffe (1894), originally known mainly as “the Annex.” He recruited a brilliant faculty, not only notable lecturers like Ralph Waldo Emerson (on philosophy) and William Dean Howells (Italian literature), but younger teachers like Adams, Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr., William James and George Santayana.
Eliot’s leadership not only made Harvard the pace-setter for other American colleges and universities, but a major figure in the reform of secondary school education. Both the elite boarding schools, most of them founded during his presidency, and the public high schools shaped their curricula to meet Harvard’s demanding standards. Eliot was a key figure in the creation of standardized admissions examinations, as a founding member of the College Entrance Examining Board.

Overall, in his 40-year reign, Eliot raised the university’s endowment from $2 million to $22 million, its faculty from 45 to 194, its student body from 500 to 2,000. As leader of the nation’s wealthiest and best-known university, Eliot was a celebrated figure whose opinions were sought on a wide variety of matters, from tax policy (he offered the first coherent rationale for the charitable tax exemption) to the intellectual welfare of the general public. He not only brought Harvard an incredible quality of leadership but everything he did helped to influenced other colleges around the country. Said the young Walter Lippmann, when the aging president strolled across his yard, he looked “a little bit like God walking around.”

Having a plain or ugly face:

The renowned Quaker scholar Rufus Jones was speaking of the importance of having a radiant countenance. After his address, a woman “with an almost unbelievably plain face” came up and asked him what he would do if he had a face like hers.

He replied, “While I have troubles of my own of that kind, I’ve discovered that if you light it up from within, any old face you have is good enough.”

For further reading on the subject, read these previous post:

THANK GOD FOR MY BIG NOSE

THE MAGIC MASK–A FABLE?

The Magic Mask…..

Did you or do you ever wish to change some feature of your face or your body? Or maybe go for thousands of dollars of expensive plastic surgery? I know I have many times. I’ve often looked at myself in the mirror and moped about all my flaws. I’ve often complained to the Lord about the way He made me. I’ve almost habitually looked at myself negatively for as long as I can remember.

Maybe looks isn’t the thing that is such a problem, maybe your personality is gruff, overbearing, to serious, severe, combative, nasty or unpleasant. Maybe you were born that way, or maybe over the years and the different choices you’ve made you’ve become like that, and people have a hard time being around you.

I’ve often read about medical studies that seem to link our spiritual and mental thoughts, with our physical health, wellbeing, and even some, that say: physically appearance can be effected by either positive or negative thoughts. So if you struggle with a physical flaw or a difficult personality, don’t give up, there is still hope. Just keep smiling, try to stay positive, and pray and ask God to help you start transforming the negative into the positive. It might even make you feel and be more attractive. Read this story that has encouraged me:

Oh yeah, and don’t stop smiling. 😀

 

 

THE MAGIC MASK

A great and powerful lord once ruled over thousands of soldiers, and with them he conquered vast domains for his own. He was wise and brave, respected and feared by all, but no one loved him. Each year as he grew more severe he grew lonelier, and his face reflected the bitterness in his greedy soul, for there were deep, ugly lines about his cruel mouth which never showed a smile, and a deep frown permanently furrowed his forehead.

It happened that in one of the cities over which he ruled there lived a beautiful girl whom he had watched for many months as she went about among the people, and he loved her and wanted to make her his wife. He decided to go and speak to her of this love. Dressing in his finest robes and placing a golden crown on his head, he looked into his mirror to see what kind of picture he would make for the beautiful girl. But he could see nothing but what would cause fear and dislike for himself–a cruel, hard face which looked even worse when he tried to smile.

Then a happy notion came to him, and he sent for a magician. “Make for me a mask of the thinnest wax so that it will follow every line of my features, but paint it with your magic paints so that it will look kind and pleasant. Fasten it upon my face so that I shall never have to take it off. Make it handsome–attractive. Use your greatest skill and I will pay any price you ask.”

“This I can do,” said the magician, “on one condition. You must keep your own face in the same lines which I paint or the mask will be ruined. One angry frown and the mask will be ruined forever, nor can I replace it.”

“I will do anything you say,” said the lord eagerly, “anything to win the admiration and love of my lady. Tell me how to keep the mask from cracking.”

“You must think kindly thoughts,” replied the magician, “and to do this you must do kindly deeds. You must make your kingdom happy rather than powerful. You must replace anger with understanding and love. Build schools for your subjects and not just prisons, hospitals and not just warships. Be gracious and courteous to all men.”

So the wonderful mask was made, and no one would have guessed that it was not the true face of the lord. Months passed, and though the mask was often in danger of ruin, the man fought hard with himself to keep it. The beautiful lady became his bride, and his subjects wondered at the miraculous change in him. They attributed it to his lovely wife, who, they said, had made him like herself.

As gentleness and thoughtfulness entered the life of this man, honesty and goodness were his also, and soon he regretted having deceived his beautiful wife with the magic mask. At last he could bear it no longer and he summoned the magician.

“Remove this false face of mine!” he cried. “Take it away! This deceiving mask that is not my true self!”
“If I do,” said the magician, “I can never make another, and you must wear your own face as long as you live.”
“Better so,” said the lord, “than to deceive one whose love and trust I have won dishonorably. Better that I should be despised by her than to go on doing what is unworthy for her sake. Take it off, I say, take it off!”

The magician took off the mask and the lord in fear and anguish sought his reflection in the glass. His eyes brightened and his lips curved into a radiant smile, for the ugly lines were gone, the frown had disappeared–and lo, his face was the exact likeness of the mask he had worn so long! And when he returned to his beloved wife she saw only the familiar features of the man she loved.

Yes, it’s an old story this legend tells: that a man’s face soon betrays what he is inside his soul, what he thinks and feels, and the thoughts of his heart. The wise and true Scripture tells us, “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he” (Proverbs 23:7), and “whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things” (Philippians 4:8). It might transform your life in more ways than you think.